Together, Forever?
by xbuttah.benzo
Summary: Still terrible at summarizing lol. Please read.. Rated M.
1. Chapter 1

Hanna's POV

"Come on Spence, what should I do? I can't take this anymore. All we do is argue and fight over little things. I love Em, I do, but it's becoming to be a little bit too much for me." I said, stressed.

"End it!" Spencer said nonchalantly.

"What, why?! "

"Because Han, Aria and I are tired of always hearing you two bicker and constantly go back and forth. You guys aren't the only ones that's being affected by this relationship. It's taken a toll on all of us and me and Ar can't take it anymore." Spencer spazzed.

Spencer was pissed. Her face was as red as it gets and her her blood was boiling.

"Spencer you don't just give up on someone that you love, exceptionally when you love them the way that I love Emily. No matter how hard it gets, you-"

"Especially," Spencer corrected.

"What?"

"You said exceptionally, you meant especially" Spencer stated.

"Spencer now isn't the time for you to be giving me an English lesson. You know what, I'm leaving."

With that being said, I stormed out of Spencer's house without looking back. Once I got to the car I shot Em a text, three simple words, short but meaningful.

"I Love You"

Emily's POV

I wake up to a text from Hanna, I looked at it and sat it right back down. Everything has been terrible between us for the past couple weeks.

I lie back down in hopes of getting some sleep only to be interrupted by Hanna bursting through my bedroom door.

"What the HELL Hanna?!" I scream

"Why didn't you text me back?" she asks shyly. She looked as if she'd been crying.

"Because I was trying to get some sleep. What's the problem?"

"Are you happy? Like, I mean, are you happy with me?" She asks with tears brimming in the her eyes.

"Right now Han, no. This.. this has to stop. All the jealousy and attitude and arguing it's not good for us. I've never had to deal things like this when I was with Maya or Samar-" Ohh shit.

Hanna's POV

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I was furious. "That's my problem Em. Every time we talk or argue or WHATEVER you ALWAYS bring up your exs. What do they have to do with what we have now? I'm not them, ok? You make me feel like I'm not good enough for you, like I don't deserve you." I was crying by the time I was finished.

"I need some time to think. We're not finished, I- I just need some time to get my head right." Emily said ignoring the fact that I was broken. She grabbed my hand and walked me out to the car, kissed my cheek and said "I love you, too" then turned her back on me and walked away.

When things like this happen between us there only a few things I can do...

Go home.

Drink the pain away momentarily.

Think about what's wrong with me and why my girlfriend isn't happy with me, no matter how hard I try.

She makes me feel worthless, like I'm not even nearly good enough. That's why I cut. Honestly, the blade is the only thing that's guaranteed there when I need it. Not my friends, alcohol, girlfriend, or even my mother but the blade? The blade is never far.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hanna's POV**

For the next couple weeks Emily has been avoiding me. She's also been hanging with Alison even more than before and she's thinks that I don't notice, but I do, I've always noticed.

I went over to Spencer's because none of my friends were returning any of my calls or text. When she opened the door she looked surprised to see me.

"Hanna, wh-what are you doing here?"

I glanced over her shoulder and saw Aria on one couch and Emily and Alison cuddled up on the other. I looked back to Spencer with tears in my eyes.

"Really Spence?"

"I, I didn't want you to be uncomfortable so I-"

"What the HELL is going on with those two?!"

"Han, I "

"You know what, Save it! I knew we'd never last. I don't know why I led myself to believe that we ever had a chance."

By the time I finished everyone was staring at me. Emily started walking towards me so I turned on my heel and started to walk away from them. by the time I reached my car Emily had caught up with me.

"Hanna what the hell is wrong with you?!"

"Em, are you fucking serious right now?! You shatter my freakin' heart into a million pieces, then stop talking to me for weeks, and now the only two people that I thought I had left are ignoring me. Not to mention the fact that you and Ali were just cuddled up on OUR side of the couch, in OUR position where WE use to be. Did you forget that I'M your girlfriend, not HER?"

"Hanna -"

"No, you know what. I'm done with every single one of you. Ali, Spencer, you and even Aria. Seems like you guys have been doing just fine anyway."

"Yeah right. Well have fun without me." She said sarcastically. "You don't deserve any of us anyway. Everything thing isn't always about you and when it is there's always a problem that follows not too long behind it.. So go because I'm not going to stop you"

"Fuck you." I said slamming my door. I drove off not really sure where I was going.

I get to the park and go to sit on the swings. I pull out my flask and take a long sip.

It helps numb the pain away for the time being.

I grab the razor, my only true friend. _"You've never let me down."_ I say to the razor being held in my right hand. I bring it to my arm.

_Slit._

_Slit._

_Slit._

I take another long drink.

_Gulp._

_Gulp._

_I don't need anyone. I have myself. I came in this world alone, and that's how I'm leaving._

_Slit._

_Slit._

I switch arms and get closer and closer to my wrist. Time to go.

I get in my car and drive. I don't care where I'm going, but somehow, someway, I will go.

As I was driving at full speed upset at the fact that the memories from earlier were flooding my mind.

My eyes start to water and everything is getting blurry. I see bright lights coming toward me head on, they didn't stop, so neither did I. I no longer cared about anything.

_Me._

_Emily._

_Spencer._

_Aria._

_Especially not Alison._

_"Fuck it, why not?" I thought._

Sure enough moments later I heard yelling and sirens and I felt numb, much like I did when I'm drunk.

Someone was standing over me then everything went black.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hanna POV**

I woke up with the worst headache of my life. My body was terribly sore and I could barely move. I went to open my eyes only to see that I was in a cast. One cast on my left leg, bandages on both my forearms and wrists and I could feel something on my face and when I reached up I could feel a few bandaids on the corner of my right brow. I tried to move, I tried so hard but something just wouldn't allow me to get up. Then slowly I fell back into a deep slumber.

**Emily POV**

As I walked back to Spencer and Aria they both gave me nasty looks.

"Guys, what the fuck is going on with us? Why are we treating Hanna like this? She's our bestfriend. I feel terrible and Em?"

I turned around to see if Hanna was still on the street, she was gone so I looked back at Spencer.

"Yeah?"

"What you said to her was totally uncalled for" She says angrily then walks away.

We all eventually go back inside and Alison's no where to be found. We thought nothing of it and went inside.

Close to 45 minutes maybe an hour we hear a car crash. The girls and I look at each other then run out the door.

We finally got to the accident and we all saw Hanna's body on the stretcher.. lifeless. I started to break ' immediately regretting everything that I said. I know that I meant none of it, but she didn't and how was I going to tell her? Would she even believe me ? Would she believe me if I told her that absolutely nothing was going on between me and Alis-

"Where's Alison?!" I ask the girls as we were sitting in the waiting room waiting to hear if Hanna was going to make it.

Spencer turned to me and said "I don't know I thought I saw her go home. You don't think she'd.. Would you ?"

"Of course not. She would NEVER EVER put any of us in any kind of danger. She loves us, she loves us so much." I almost whisper the last sentence.

"This could be A that did this to Hanna and if it was they could possibly hurt Ali too" I said, growing worried.

" Em, get a grip. Are you actually serious right now? She's the reason we're in this mess and so are you. You just couldn't leave well enough alone. And fyi did you forget I heard some of the things you said to her, what are you even here for?."

"But-"

"But nothing Em, don't give me that crap. She only said the things she said because she was hurt, she felt betrayed and she was protecting herself and all you do Emily, all you do is make excuses."

"You know what? Whatever. Alison could be somewhere hurt and you're accusing me of making excuses?"

"Are you frickin' serious Em?! You're seriously worried about Alison when she was the one who left for two years and weren't even thinking about you? No, go! Leave and don't you dare come back. You didn't really love Hanna, you used her until Alison was finally able to come home. She was just a fill-in. Something to kill time all the while you were thinking of Alison. Let's not forget who was always there for you when Alison wasn't." Shouted Aria before Spencer could say anything.

"Yeah so what, I used her happy now?! I have somewhere more important to be." Both of their mouths dropped and I turned to see Hanna, in her hospital gown, a wheel chair, with a cast on and bruises and cuts all over her with tears streaming down her face and I felt terrible hoping she didn't hear what was just said but I could tell by the look in her eyes that she had heard everything and I started to feel over whelmed.

"Hanna, I-I didn't mean-"

"Now look what you've done." "You're nothing but trouble." Spencer and Aria said at the same time.

I felt a tear drop and I ran away as quick as I could, without looking back.

As I made my way to Spencer's house I called Alison over and over and over until she finally answered.

"Ali! Hey, where are you?"

_"Home. What's wrong?"_

"I'm omw." Then I hang up. She said she'd be waiting for me at the door.

We walked up to her room and I told her what happened then she kissed me. I pulled away and looked at her, "Alison, this isn't right." She smirked then she groped the back of my neck and forcefully laid me down and whatever happens, happens.

I rolled over on top of her and straddled her waist. I kissed her neck and then her jawline back to her lips. She tugged at the bottom of my shirt and I ripped it off. She undid my bra and captured one of my hardened nipples between her warm, soft, pink lips. She flicked it continuously with her soft tongue and I let out a deep moan. She switched to the other nipple and it drove me crazy. The more she licked the wetter I got.

"Everything is gonna be just fine" Alison seductively whispered and kissed my ear.

She flipped us over and forced off my pants and my underwear. She leaned up to kiss me again, then dug right in.

No stopping now, I'm in too deep.

"Ohhh, ALISON!"


	4. Chapter 4

**Hanna POV**

It's been a week since the incident in the hospital with the girls and I've been torn ever since. Spencer and Aria come and check on me everyday, I haven't seen Em at all but she has texted a few times asking if I was okay. Like, seriously? Really? And every time I see Alison she gives me her signature smirk. What fucked up life I have. My mother is only there when I'm near death or in a hospital. My girlfriend, or ex girlfriend, doesn't give a shit about me and is probably fucking the one who has tortured us enough.

_Lucky me._

As I get home Aria calls and says she be over in a little while. It feels good to have someone there for me in a tough time and will help me keep my mind off of things. I make my way downstairs to get the door.

"Hey Ar"

"Hey Han, how are you?"

"Just great!" I say sarcastically with a thumbs up.

"I have an idea Hanna" Aria says as she pulls out a bottom of Jack Daniels with a huge, hopeful smile on her face. I grin and we make our way to me room. She pulls me down onto the bed and less than 30 minutes later the whole bottle was gone. Not a drop left in sight.

We sat there talking about anything and everything. From fashion and shopping to music and our celebrity crushes.

I went to use the bathroom and as I walked back into the room I was hit in the face with a pillow and the room filled with laughter. I dived onto the bed to grab a pillow and it was all out war between us, feathers everywhere in the room. I tried to run but fell and along came Aria tumbling down on top of me. We giggled and giggled until we couldn't laugh anymore. We stared longingly into each others eyes searching for something to do or say. I leaned forward and so did she, I closed my eyes an felt her soft lips press against mine.

We kissed each other hungrily, touching and probing one another desperate for more contact... more skin. I lightly pushed her off and without a second thought I pulled her up with me to the bed and took off every piece on clothing we had on. Luckily, my mom was on a business trip and would be gone for a few days.

I didn't think about what I was doing, the only thing that mattered was that I was happy in the process and I felt **_wanted_**.

_Loved_.

_Important_.

Aria lightly kissed my lips then down to my neck. She sucked on my pulse point hard and I was pretty darn sure she left a mark. Did I care? No. Because, for once, it's actually about ME.

She kissed and licked down the middle of my chest, down to my navel and the closer she got down there the more my breath hitched and my back arched off of the bed. She grabbed my thighs and slowly pushed her tongue in between my folds. Going in as far as she could she licked up and down and anywhere her tongue could reach. Slowly, she receded and made her way up my soaking slit. Once she got to my bundle of nerves she sucked, nibbled, licked and kissed it. She slipped three fingers in and started licking so fast I couldn't control myself nor could I breathe, going in and out like crazy.

My legs were shaking, I was moaning her name, like curses, falling out of my lips.

Gripping her hair and the sheets, I just couldn't tame it anymore.

"ARIA! Yeeeees!" I scream as I release my fluids onto her.

After I reached my high and eventually came down she kissed me on the lips and I tasted myself. Aria said "I've been waiting so long to do that to you. You taste better than I could've ever imagined." with a wink she rolled off out my bed. I watched her as she got up.

Before I could stop I hear myself saying "And where exactly do you think you're going? It's my turn to return the favor midget." I say pulling her back down.

**The next day..**

Aria and I are on our way to Spencer's. We rode hand in hand and she was rubbing the back of my haired ever soon lightly. We pull up to the Hastings' household and we see Emily leaving Alison's place. As soon as she spots us her eyes grew wide as if she could already tell what I was thinking. On our way to the door, she jogs up.

"Han, can I talk to you?" Emily says.

"What do you want with her asshole?" Aria butts in before I could say anything and I grin at her willingness to protect me.

"Aria, Hanna.. guys please just let me explain." She says.

"Explain what?! Why you were over there with your little girlfriend? Why you used me? Or how about how you broke my heart over and over again? Actually, we can talk about how you treated me like a piece of shit for so long and why you never once came to visit me in the hospital, or called." I burst into tears and my heart was overwhelmed and conflicted. It felt so good to see her.. hear her voice but it also hurts so bad to know she doesn't care.

"Hanna, I love you, you know that it's just-" Emily starts.

"Just what? Emily ask me how my wrists feel," I say pulling up my sleeves showing her my bruises. "Because you and that bitch are the reason they're here."

"Hanna I'm so sorry. Please just hear me out, please I'm begging you." I turn and start to walk away.

Emily starts to cry but I don't care I continue to walk away. I'm tired of crying, it's her turn.


	5. Authors Note

Hey Guys,

I was just writing this because I was curious to know if I should continue with this story or not. If you think that I should or if you have ANY suggestions, please, do not hesitate to PM me or leave a review.

Thanks in Advance, xoxo.


	6. Chapter 5

**Hellllooooo people, it has been wayyy too long and I have missed you all so dearly. I just want to say thank you to everyone who has supported me and this story. New readers, old readers, thank you for your patience and willingness to believe in me and this story, I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

**p.s don't forget to review. I would look to hear ALL of you guys' feedback. Til next time (inserts kissy face emoji)**

**H****anna POV**

have you ever experienced a heartbreak? I mean, literally feel your heart break in your chest and the bits and pieces fall down into the center of your stomach and you have no other choice but to deal with the sunken heart you were left with and aching pain inside of you?

I decided to stop contacting and interacting with any "friends" of mine and focus on myself. So, here I am three weeks later, cast off and scars healed (on the inside, that is), heels on and head held high with the only one that has always cared for, loved, and done their best to protect me.

Mona.

"So, I hear since you stopped associating yourself with those bitches they've dispersed and has went their separate ways" Mona says with caution, eyeing me. Instead of replying, I ignored her simply because they are no longer my problem.

Funny how the ones you'd do anything for treat you like complete shit until something horrible happens, right? after everything, from them ignoring and excluding me to suddenly being there for me when the crash happened, I was just tired of it, the fake Love, the confusion, that dishonesty, distrust and most of all the heartbreak. I reach the point were I decided to be selfish with myself.

As Mona and I make our way through the mall we run into Aria, much to my dismay. I try my best to act as if I didn't see her just so I could keep going on but . . .

"Hanna? is that you?" Andddd we're off!

"Hey wait up!"

"Hey Aria, what's up?" I ask, although I already know where this conversation is headed.

"What do you mean what's up? Seriously Hanna you just-" she stops to look at Mona then back to me. "can I talk to you? Alone?"

I hesitate for a second but ultimately gave in.

"Hey Mona," I look over to her, "i'll meet you in Rive Gauche"

Mona give me a knowing look but says "Sure thing" and heads off.

Once me and Aria went to her car she starts off what she initially started.

"You basically fucked me then disappeared for 3 weeks, 3weeks Hanna! Do you know how that made me feel?"

"Aria, I-"

"No Hanna! You don't get to give excuses for that because we damn near crucified her for what she did to you and you turn around and do something similar to me." she scoffs, "I really thought you were better than that Han."

"If I remember correctly NONE of you were there for me until I was almost dead! You guys were basically nonexistent when I had to do anything with me so excuse me for looking out for me and protecting me since every single one of my "best friends" failed to do so. You don't get to be mad at me. But, I am so sorry for what I did to you, I was her and I feel that you guys chose Emily over me regardless of the situation."

"Hanna I'll do whatever I have to in order to fix this between us. I miss us! Han, I miss you."

"We'll talk later, okay?" I say quietly, she nods. As I lean forward to hug her she kisses my cheek and I realize how much I truly did miss her. She smiles and we exit her car and part ways.

After hours of shopping, Mona and I head back to my place and we put on a fashion show for each other. Modeling in the mirrors, music, a small room sized diy runway and fake photographers the whole nine, and we were having a complete blast in each other's company.

"Hanna," Mona says stopping the music. "I need to talk to you."

"What's the deal babe?" I ask, she looked worried so I gave her my full attention.

She stiffens, "I just uh – I um, well.." she takes a deep breath, "Hanna, this is just a warning if I actually say this out loud it's going to change everything! Are you sure want to hear it, honestly?"

Although, I'm afraid of what might be said, I take my time and decide that I still want to hear what she has to say anyways. "Yes! Absolutely."

"Love inspires the most beautiful gestures. Love makes us starry-eyed; it makes us swoon. It makes us want to write sonnets and dance until dawn. It makes us do things that other people might even think are a little crazy. It also inspires some of the most beautiful people to be the only person you see in a room full of others.. that's what love, true love, does to you. I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close. For me, home isn't a place. It's a person and when I'm with you, Hanna Marin, I'm finally home."


End file.
